Embarking on your Faith Journey

Have any of you ever read a really great book or watched a really great movie or heard a really great story? Now, what did that book, movie or story have that was so great about it? Maybe it had to do with some mythical place, or an incredibly interesting main character. Perhaps you were able to identify with it in some way. Something about that story drew you in. And I can tell you, that each of these stories has something very simple in common. They all have some sort of journey that you as the reader, watcher, or listener follow. It may be a journey to a long time ago in a galaxy far, far, away, to Hogwarts, Middle Earth, Narnia, Metropolis or Gotham. It might be a journey of self-discovery, or one where the main character saves the world. We are drawn into this story. We are drawn into the mystery.

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I have this map up here. It belongs to my Dad, and it had a prominent place in my home for most of my life. It’s a hand drawn map of Middle Earth, the world that J.R.R. Tolkien created for his famous trilogy, The Lord of the Rings. I grew up staring at it, memorizing the landmarks and physical obstacles along the way from the Shire to Mount Doom in Mordor. This is one of the stories that I was enamored with as a child. I loved the idea of the adventures that took place in Middle Earth. I wanted to meet characters like Bilbo and Gandalf, and I wanted to be a strong heroin just like Arwen.

Now, what if I told you that our faith can be just like one of these journeys.

Just like the ones that we see in our favorite books, movies, or stories.

 You might be thinking I’m a little crazy at this point. But, one of my favorite saints, St. John Paul II is quoted in saying, “Life with Christ is a Wonderful Adventure”.

There is a moment in every story where the main character is posed with a question. Usually that question is whether or not to take on an adventure. Whether they’re off to destroy a ring, find a horcrux, or save the city from eternal doom, there is a moment when the main character consciously makes the choice to do the right thing. And often enough, we learn that the main character was destined to take part in that journey.

So are we.

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This painting is one of my favorites. It’s called “The Calling of St. Matthew” and it was painted by a guy named Caravaggio in 1600. Here we can see a ray of light making its way to Matthew, while Christ is pointing at him. The story of this painting actually comes from a story in the Gospel. The Gospel of Matthew tells us:

 “As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man named Matthew- sitting at the customs post. He said to him, “Follow me.” And he got up and followed him. While he was at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners came and sat with Jesus and his disciples. The Pharisees saw this and said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” He heard this and said, “Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do. Go and learn the meaning of the words, ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.” – Matthew 9:9-13

We all have this moment. There is a moment where we are asked to join Christ on a journey. We are asked to accompany him on an adventure that we were made for.

My faith journey started out like many others. It was quiet. I grew up on Long Island, went to public school, lived with my Grandma, Mom & Dad, big sister Julie, and went to Mass on Sundays. I played with neighbors as a kid, and loved to draw and write stories. For me, this moment of encounter didn’t happen as a child, at my baptism, first communion, or confirmation, but rather, it happened on a retreat, kind of like the one you’re on right now. I had had a couple of really rough years in high school. I was anxious, depressed, I had lost friends, and a boyfriend who I was too dependent on, and my Dad had moved out and my parents divorced. I was a senior in High School. I wasn’t living a life for Christ, even though I had gone to Church, to youth group, and volunteered my time to the poor and to the younger children at my parish. I was living day to day, trying to fake a smile, and act as though everything was okay. I knew that I wasn’t though. I knew that I was loved, but couldn’t grasp what that meant, or how it could affect my life.

And so I went on this retreat. I didn’t particularly like going to youth group anymore, but out of habit, I went on the Spring Retreat. Ironically, or not so ironically, the theme of the retreat was “I will Follow” and we had to sing this awful song and do silly hand movements to it. However, I knew that being a scutch and remaining closed off was not going to be fun for anyone. So, I tried to be open and listen to all of the presentations and participate in the prayer services. Friday night we handed whatever was burdening us over to God by tossing a rock into the Long Island Sound. We were asked to quiet ourselves, and to think of what was burdening us. There were thousands of pebbles on the beach. We each picked up two rocks. One represented our burdens, and one represented a promise. We each threw our burden into the Sound, and held on tight to our promise. I began to open up then. But the true turning point for me was on Saturday night. I sat in adoration of the Eucharist, which is when the Eucharist is exposed in a gold stand called a monstrance for a prolonged period of time. I desired mercy; just like St. Matthew. I had experienced God’s loving grace in the sacrament of confession. And as I sat, for the first time feeling peace in front of the Eucharist, I cried, and felt a whisper in my heart to come, and follow Him.  I felt an overwhelming sense in my heart that I was loved. Truly Loved.

In that moment, just like St. Matthew, I got up, and followed Him.

I was drawn into the mystery.

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I found Joy on that retreat. For the first time in a long time, I found joy in doing simple everyday things. I even found Joy in getting stuck in the mud of a small Long Island Harbor, after running after my friends onto what looked like solid ground. In case you were wondering, I did ruin my flip flops that day. I had no idea what this journey would entail or what my destination would be. To be completely honest with you, I still don’t know what the destination is. I can tell you, that since I decided to get up and follow Him, my life has truly been an adventure. I’ve gone places, done things, and encountered people that I wouldn’t have even thought possible in High School. But, I had to take that first step and climb that very high mountain. I had to leave my comfortable life behind, and like Frodo and Sam in The Lord of the Rings, I left the Shire.

I started to take my volunteer work seriously. I was a volunteer with the Middle School Youth Group at my Parish. I played silly games along the way with middle schoolers and enjoyed it. I even let a 12 year old do my hair with shaving cream for the “Edge Kids Take Over”. It took a few showers to get it all out.

I went on trips to places I had only dreamed about before. I walked the streets of Dublin and Paris with my Mom and sister.

I took in the beauty of one of the world’s oldest book of Gospels, The Book of Kells, in Dublin, and I stood in awe of Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris. I went on pilgrimage to Madrid, Spain for World Youth Day 2011. I walked along the same cobblestone streets as St. Teresa and St. John of the Cross. I sat in the same churches as a Doctor of the Church. As a group, we went to Mass with various English-Speaking Cardinals, and eventually with Pope Benedict XVI.

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We stood and humbly waited in the rain, which was described as a hurricane over the announcer. There was obviously a mistranslation there. And we waited for the Pope to arrive. We met young Catholics from all over the world: Colombia, France, Iraq, Australia, Nigeria, and Malaysia. I found I had a friend in Jesus’s mother after I realized that each church I went into had the image that my Parish is named after, Our Lady of Perpetual Help. This still happens by the way.

In college, I continued to follow Him along a path that I couldn’t quite see, and had some incredible experiences. I trudged through Washington DC in 10 degree weather as a witness to the beauty that Human Life is at the March for Life.

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 I studied in Galway, Ireland, after working up the courage to follow the desires of my heart and change my major from something that would secure me a job after graduation, to something that I truly loved: English Literature and Irish Studies.

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 I sat in the middle of a country road in a town where there were more sheep than people, and appreciated the beauty of creation with a sunrise at 4am with some of my wonderful classmates.

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 I took a bus and visited relatives that I had never met and shared in faith and tea and ice cream with them. We drove all over my Grandfathers hometown.  I felt a little silly standing with that tomb stone in the rain, but I knew that these were the family members that gave me my Catholic faith, this was the church where my grandparents and great grandparents worshipped a God who is Love, and so I complied and smiled as a cousin I barely knew took my picture.

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I walked across the Peace Bridge in a city where violence was the norm for so long. I shared in the hurt that my cousins felt from the past, but also listened to their hope for their city and for their home. I quite literally crossed the River Foyle with them and was present as they shared their story and their heart with me.

I traveled in a minivan, and my campus minister was pulled over by cop in West Virginia for going 83 mph, to a place that I had never been. There were mountains there. I served the poor of Appalachia in Beauty, KY with some of the most kind-hearted, loving people I know.

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The Lord helped me break out of my comfort zone by working with power tools and to truly be present with the people of Beauty. I was reminded by a cook that I met from Georgia, just how beautiful my soul was, and how she could see it in my eyes. I spoke of my love for Mother Teresa and the Catholic Faith with a nurse from the next town after she confided in me just how beautiful she found the Catholic Church, even though she was a Baptist. She met me with love, not judgment, just as Jesus had.

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I built a deck and a ramp that week along with 8 of my classmates and mentors. That is something I would have never thought I could do, much less that I would want to. My Dad still doesn’t quite believe it.  Even in the mud that week, I found Joy.

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More recently, Jesus asked me to climb an even higher mountain. He asked me to serve in a way that I had never thought before. He asked me to move away from home to a place called Garrison, and to run retreats where students could encounter Him. I laughed, but after much prayer and a leap of faith, I went. And I could not be happier. Those words that JPII spoke are true, “Life with Christ is a wonderful adventure.”

Will you get up and follow him?

This presentation was given on the Sophomore Retreat: Faith Journey through CYFM. 

Mornings like these

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This morning was just one of those mornings that was absolutely perfect. Now, the pictures above isn’t from this morning, but I feel as though it captures what this morning was for me. Relaxing bliss, and sunshine. Lots of sunshine.

You see, this all started last night when I asked Chris to say a prayer that I would actually get up in the morning and make it to mass. I knew that we would have a slow morning, because we didn’t have to be at work until the late afternoon to set up for the retreat this weekend.

Every morning, my alarm clock is set for 7:30am, exactly a half hour before mass, which is about 50 steps from my front door. The Cap Corps Volunteers live in an old convent on the property of the parish here in Beacon. It’s lovely, because if we don’t have mass as a community, we can hop on over to the parish for mass with the greater Beacon community. I’ve been wanting to make it to mass at the parish for a few weeks now, but I hadn’t been very successful. But, this morning was the morning. My alarm went off at 7:30 and I hit snooze (per usual), but then I received a text message asking if I was getting up for mass. I internally groaned, and replied “If I get out of bed, yes.” I then remembered that I asked Chris to hold me accountable, so that I would indeed get up. With that, I rolled out of bed, put on pants and a shirt, threw on my vest, brushed through my hair, brushed my teeth, grabbed my keys, and set out for 8am mass.

I was a couple of minutes late, which to be honest is pretty embarrassing because I live next door to the church. I sat down as the first reading began, and prayerfully entered into the mass.

After mass, I walked back over to the Red House, and grabbed my wallet. The nearest Dunkin Donuts is about 15 minutes away, so I decided to use a gift card that I have and get a cup of coffee. It was really nice to take a ride by myself down beautiful NY-9D, listening to music that I like.

I arrived back at the Red House around 9am and expected people to start making their way downstairs. They didn’t though. They must have taken advantage of the opportunity to sleep. So, I sat down at the dining room table, made some breakfast and enjoyed my coffee in the quiet. I read a few articles, perused twitter, read the Blessed Is She devotion, and realized that my favorite show, Fixer Upper is now on Netflix. And so, I went upstairs, closed my door, and watched an episode on Netflix. Now, for those of you who don’t know, the Red House has very basic cable, which is fine because we don’t spend much time at home, and we still get basic stations. With that, I haven’t watched HGTV since I moved up to Beacon. So this morning, when I realized that my favorite show was on Netflix, I thought to myself, “Wow, Jesus must love me.”

I relaxed, tidied up my room, and then got ready for my day. I packed for the retreat this weekend, showered, dressed for work, and even said a rosary. This morning was slow and lovely. I feel as though I had an entire day before I saw any of my housemates. From time to time, I think I need that. God is Good.

Sunday

I've Always Been a Storm

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It’s funny. Since I don’t have a car here, or easy access to daily mass, I’ve become extra grateful for Sunday mass at the Cathedral here in Galway. The Cathedral is absolutely beautiful! And, off to the side there is a small chapel for adoration. My goal is to make it to a daily mass here before I leave. Hopefully that happens. My sleeping schedule is a little off (still). I usually don’t get out of bed until 11am and don’t make it to sleep until after 2am. Fun? Eh. Not really. I’d rather be up early. I’m working on it.

However, yesterday’s Gospel really hit me.

“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves. 
For my yoke…

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Saturday and Sunday

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Happy Sunday! Yesterday our group HIKED to the Cliffs of Moher from Doolin. The view was totally worth it… However, we weren’t expecting the difficulty that was the “walk” to the cliffs. Our legs hurt, but we’re feeling okay. In the past 3 days we have walked over 30 miles. It seems insane. Our hike took most of our Saturday. When we got back to our B&B we prepared for dinner and then went to Fitz’s pub down the road. We had our communal dinner which was really nice. We stayed at the pub until around 11pm listening to the trad music. And of course, when we left Fitz’s the sky was still light. The sun was still setting. I CANNOT get over this part of Ireland. Sunday morning we had one last breakfast at the B&B and walked down to the tea shop. I had my first cup of coffee while abroad. Delicious! We headed back to bring our bags downstairs and Frank, our host, offered to let us feed the cows…

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We love Frank, and cows.

Then, we headed to our bus to Galway. Our driver gave us a little tour of the Burren, which is the land between Doolin and Galway. We arrived in Galway where we unpacked in our dorms and explored campus a bit. Then we headed to mass at the Cathedral in Galway City. I was really glad that my classmates came with me. It was really nice to have company, especially in a new city. This mass was the shortest one I have been to yet. The priest’s homily was all about having your faults turn into strengths, just like Sts. Peter and Paul. Communion was different though. The mass was not in Latin, but everyone received the Eucharist as though it was a Latin mass. To be honest, I was pleasantly surprised. I love receiving the Eucharist while kneeling. The Cathedral was beautiful. The rose windows had amazing stained glass. Then our group had dinner at a local pub and explored the medieval streets of Galway. I’m excited to explore this city more.

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